While some scientists waste time urging immediate, large scale adaptation to the planetary climate crisis, Florida lawmakers have simply made it go away via House Bill 1745, which combines enlightened legislation with magical thinking.

Having achieved major success banning library books about trans people and minority history, the emboldened GOP-dominated legislature has now outdone itself in the area of climate science. Ron’s army simply went ahead and banned the term “climate change” from official state documents and proceedings. References to energy efficient vehicles, contracting with “green lodgings” for meetings and cleaner fuels for conferences have been eliminated.

In a separate move, local governments in Florida will not be permitted to mandate heat protection – water breaks etc. – for outdoor workers, the need for hydration being another woke liberal hoax.

To be sure, some alarmists are concerned about Florida’s vulnerability to global warming, manifested by 100°F water temperatures last year, a massive coral bleaching emergency, accelerating temperatures, rapidly rising sea levels (about 8 in. since 1950), location in the path of intensifying hurricanes and soaring insurance rates. That’s why we needed Untermensch DeSantis to make it all go away with a flick of his little pen.

The boys of the GOP did manage to rename A1A to Jimmy Buffet Highway, effective until the iconic coastal thoroughfare disappears under the waves of the insurgent Atlantic Ocean.

Summary on Spring 2024 climate shocks:

 

including sudden Dubai inundation, western and southern Africa droughts, Venezuela ablaze, Florida cancels climate change. epic China floods, sparkling wine threatened by drought, Bangalore running out of water, Bogota running out of water, Madagascar extended drought and Dengue fever spreading.